day 2

It's bedtime - I'm exhausted but case anyone is curious about my survival I thought I would force myself to reflect for a minute.

I LOVED today. Waited with eager anticipation for familiar faces coming to my door - met each face with a handshake/hug and the directions "find a cubby and let's find your name to move it "I am here"" And every one of the 17 that came arrived in perfect timing, giving me just a few seconds with each child. I know it won't always be like that, so I enjoyed it.

Then breakfast - late - more cereal with milk (seriously...pancakes - eggs - anything would be better than my entire class pouring milk on apple jacks). 3 milks were sour and chunky (gross). 3 kids thought their milk tasted like juice (gross). One child ate two breakfasts...he was hungry. Turns out he was a lot of things, including a heart breaker, as he was suspended part way through the day. Mostly to get the home he is living at to come get him and also because he doesn't belong in a regular education classroom. : (. He bolted after breakfast and thankfully the librarian was in the room so I could chase him. He is so little but he is a bulky kid with a lot of will power, a whole lot of anger, and no family. Not to mention I think he has FAS and he has a different thinking process than most children...needless to say I can't give him the right support and so we hope he will find his way into a school with behavior specialists who can help him. In the meantime I hurt for him. : (

My little friend who is named after what a princess wears on her head - yes - Tiara - threw only 2 tantrums today, not as loud and not as long...shoes only came off once. My other friend refused to leave the cafeteria and the playground - forcing me to use his parents, tomorrow's recess, and storytime as threats - things I would never use...well his parents perhaps.

Centers were the roughest part today - we didn't "freeze" well and so it was hard to move them around. I suppose we will practice that tomorrow. I need to think it through better. Lining up was good - songs work for everything...they came in humming my good morning song so I suppose that's a good sign. 4 kids fell asleep, wore them out I guess and let them rest for almost an hour. I need new kids songs, I have exhausted Head and Shoulders as well as If You're Happy and You Know it. Time to dig out some Raffi songs.

I need to plan for a few minutes and I am realizing today's reflection doesn't read well or flow....but I guess I'm just fried. I'm in trouble when it's a full week!

Still - I love every single second.

Day 1

The first day of my first year - complete with the Mayor the Superintendent, the district people, NBC camera crews, and both principals in a room of crying, wiggling, stubborn 4 year olds wearing graduation caps. Oh my goodness. Suffice to say I cried when my principal asked how the day went...feel ridiculous now when I look back and realize that we did centers, we read 3 stories, sang 4 songs, drew pictures, put stickers on our names, walked in the hall, had recess, survived someone refusing to come in, survived 3 tantrums - from the same child, complete with kicking off shoes and back arching, survived a wheezing, feverish child who was removed from his home last night, and a reading, talking (with no filter) 4 year old who tried to run the room. Not to mention a child who only speaks Turkish.

Yeah and I'm smiling - breathing -and exhausted on the other side. Why I cried? I think the daunting task of going from chaos to reading is overwhelming. I don't know where to start with them. But it felt good...really....parts of it anyway.

Room 17

"You have Brains in your head and feet in your shoes, you can steer yourself any direction you choose!" The words face you as you leave my bright, warm, and Dr. Seuss-filled room that now smells of air freshener and new crayons. Name tags are down, boards are almost done, the finishing touches today. I soak up the silence, broken by the jazz I am playing to keep calm. I love it. I am here, I have keys to a room that is mine...I have 23 students who will meet me tomorrow and in a few short months leave me to be big 1st graders...and in the mean time I have the responsibility of teaching them how to be little people - respectful, kind, independent, reading, speaking, computing, cleaning, and writing, little people. YIKES!! I don't even know how to start. I wonder if it is possible to be overprepared. 2 bachelor degrees and 1 master's later I don't feel any more ready than I did after the first degree...or even after my first education class....

Here goes.

Noises

Settling into a new space is exciting - expensive - exhausting - and here I am at 12:30 am - I have to be up by 6:45am and all I hear are noises. What was that? How did something fall if no one is there to make it move? What's creaking? Who's outside? Did I lock the doors (for the 100th time). Things I've never worried about or thought about and suddenly it's my space...my home...and it's up to me to make it cozy, safe, sleepable, visitable, and familiar.

I'll just lay here until the house is familiar with me then...go ahead, make noise, I'll learn to love them and I learn to call this place my first home away from home.

those questions everyone asks

So I fly out tonight to start my job on Monday and every time I see someone who knows me or my family, I get these questions...

1. when do you start: Monday
2. Why so early: It's a Tier 3 Turnaround School with a Brand new faculty - lots to change before school starts
3. When do the kids start: September 1
4. What grade: Kindergarten
5. How cute! : yes I am excited.
6. How old: mostly 4 years old New haven is the least strict district about the cut off age.
7. Are you ready? : Well I think so ... but I have some shopping to do.
8. How Many? : Probably 25 or so
9. Full day or half day? : Full - extended day - school day is about and 1.5 hours longer than a normal school.
10. What does turn around mean?: It means they were failing, they fired their faculty and only hired back 4 teacher - the rest of us are new hires and are all in agreement about what good urban ed looks like.
11. Are you so excited? : Yes but I have also been having nightmares every night about the first day of school.
12. Where are you living? : About 5 mins from my school in an apartment I haven't seen yet - I move in on Friday.

I LOVE to talk about my job ... but those are the top 12 questions : ).

Also - Sunday I will pick up a play kitchen for my classroom and Tuesday some potato heads and a dollhouse - very exciting!